Photo by Moose Photos from Pexels

We’ve all been there before. You made plans at the beginning of the week for the weekend thinking that you would enjoy a night out on Friday to kick off your weekend. After a long and hard work week, you finally get to Friday and the last thing you want to do is go out, but you find yourself having a very difficult time canceling the plans that you have already made. You don’t want to upset your friend, but you also really don’t feel like a night out in town is what you need right now. Instead of begrudgingly continuing forth with these unwanted plans, here’s how to politely cancel plans.

It’s all in the How

The first thing you need to keep in mind is how you deliver this news. It is best to not just send them a text. Instead, you should make a phone call. A text message can easily be overlooked and it is also hard to control your tone through text. You may appear rude or blunt in tone when you had no intention of doing that. With a phone call, you can make sure there’s no misunderstanding and you can also express any disappointment in having to cancel or alternative dates for plans. When they can hear your voice, they can better understand your intentions.

Be Honest

There are many reasons why one would cancel plans from anxiety, overscheduling, and even just simply being too tired to go out. Whatever reason it is, be honest with the person and yourself. Don’t make up excuses. If the truth gets revealed, that would just cause a lot of tension and could even hurt your relationship with this person. Whatever reason you have, you don’t need to try and justify it for yourself. If this person truly is your friend, they wouldn’t want you to go out and be miserable. 

What if You don’t Know or Don’t Want to Talk About It?

Sometimes, you just don’t know or you really aren’t ready to talk about it. A lot of times, people cancel because of really personal reasons like social anxiety, depression, or just an overwhelming feeling of dread that is making going out a huge physical and mental challenge that you’d rather not endure. It can be very hard to talk about at the moment, so don’t feel like you have to. Don’t simply say “I’m not coming” but let them know kind of how you are feeling at the moment and that you would tell them more once you feel ready. 

As long as you are honest with your friend, you shouldn’t have to feel any guilt. Plans are meant to be fun and relaxing and not something you dread doing. If it becomes that, relax and breathe. Take a minute, and then reach out to your friend and honestly and confidently express to them what is going on.